More than two decades have passed sinceMonica Lewinskywas put under the microscope after her affair with then-PresidentBill Clintonmade headlines in 1998 — and every aspect of the former intern’s life was publicly examined and critiqued, including her physical appearance.
“We didn’t even have words like ‘fat shaming’ or ‘slut shaming’ then,” Lewinskyrecently told PEOPLE. “It was incredibly painful.” And the sting of that lingers.
“I still don’t like having my photo taken professionally,” admits Lewinsky, 48, one of the producers of the FX seriesImpeachment: American Crime Story. “Twenty-plus years on, there’s still a mental tape that holds some of those traumatic experiences of hearing people say awful things, seeing cartoons of myself and this idea that the only reason an actual relationship [with Clinton] could have been possible was if I were more attractive. I already had self-esteem issues and being the object of ridicule didn’t help.”
And, asImpeachmentunderlines, Lewinsky wasn’t the only womaninvolved in Clinton’s scandalswho was scrutinized for her appearance. Indeed, Lewinsky says, that was one of the nuances she wanted to dig into in the show, on which she is a producer.
“When I had my first dinner with[American Crime Storycreator] Ryan Murphy, we talked about these moments with Paula [Jones], Linda [Tripp] and me and Hillary [Clinton],” she says.
Monica Lewinsky.Greg Gorman
Monica Lewinsky (center) in May 1998.Bob Riha, Jr./Getty
“Here was one place where political affiliation didn’t matter,” she continues. “The misogyny and making fun of people’s appearance: Bill got it sometimes, a few jokes about pudge and a McDonald’s burger — and the same happened to Trump — but not to any degree that it happened to the women.”
“My goal with the show, and I think that was with the others as well,” Lewinsky says, “was to bring as much humanity as possible. Having had the experiences I’ve had of being publicly humiliated, I’m more sensitive than most. I advocated on behalf of many characters at different points in places that I thought we could pull back.”
Wading back into such recent history was something she weighed “very carefully,” she says.
“I don’t make decisions to do things about my past lightly,” she explains. “I recognize that every time — and I know it because I have been on the other end. And anytime anybody in this constellation of people tells their story, it’s hard for other people. And whether it is the small group, or the families, I recognize that.”
Bill Clinton (left) and Monica Lewinsky.Diana Walker/Getty; Tom Wargacki/WireImage
“I’m proud of the show,” Lewinsky says. “Do I love everything in it? No. But if I loved everything than we didn’t do our job right. It has to have objectivity. It’s not just my story.”
“There’s a lot of emotional truth in the series,” she says. “And that was important.”
The experience of being under the microscope also taught Lewinsky to pull back — and examine the bigger picture.
“Rather than Bill [Clinton] specifically, we’re seeing the sands shifting in our society,” she says. “What do we see with a powerful man? What do they get to get away with or why do they pay a much smaller price than people? Often women and people in marginalized groups but definitely people who have less power.”
“So I think those are the kind of things to look at.”
Monica Lewinsky.Axelle/Bauer-griffin/filmmagic
Now an anti-bullying advocate and speaker, Lewinsky these days is also focusing on a burgeoning produce career in Hollywood, including a HBO Max documentary,15 Minutes of Shame,which begins streaming Thursday.
“I’m interested in stories where we’re hearing from a voice that’s maybe an unexpected voice. Maybe it’s a story we know from a perspective or angle we hadn’t considered — or that’s changed because the world has changed,” she says. “I’m interested in all layers of personal transformation.”
source: people.com
