The couple isexpecting a son in August, and Smith tells PEOPLE that River, whodied due to a tragic drowning accident at homein June 2019, “is very alive in our everyday life,” in discussions among them and their children (sonLincoln, 7, and daughterLondon, 9) and even with friends and neighbors who didn’t get the chance to know the little boy thatlit up his parents' and siblings liveson a regular basis.
Smith, 41, and Amber are still grieving — a process that will always be present in their lives, in some way — but they’re also celebrating this new miracle on the way who is about to join their family this summer, as well as opening up about how the pregnancy came to be.
Granger Smith and wife Amber’s pregnancy announcement.Paul De La Cerda
The couple recallundergoing in vitro fertilization, as they had planned for River to be their last child and Amber, 39, had her tubes tied after he was born. But things changed when the country crooner realized he had “extra love to give as a father,” and they learned IVF was a way around the fact that Amber’s surgery was irreversible.
Tragedy struck again, though, when Amber miscarried with the first of the two viable embryos they produced via IVF. “I have had friends whohave gone through miscarriagesand it’s one of those things that until you go through it, you have no idea … what that pain is, not only emotionally but physically,” she says. “I had no idea of the pain you go through for hours.”
“And sometimes it takes days or weeks,” Amber continues. “I just have a whole new respect and compassion for women who experience this. Andit’s so much more common than we know of.”
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Thankfully, their second embryo stuck — and they didn’t end up telling their kids about the loss, which they’d experienced in Amber’s first trimester, until they also had happy news to share with them this time around.
“Wereally needed a fresh start,” the “Backroad Song” hitmaker explains. “We didn’t need to forget anything — we just needed a new change of pace where we’re really reestablishing new roots on a new piece of land with some new neighbors, a new grocery store and a new way to work. And getting us out of the rut that it’s easy to get into, especially after tragedy, where you start driving the same road and you start thinking the same thoughts and you kind of get sucked into the same path.”
Adds Amber, “We didn’t want to stay stuck in our grief where we couldn’t grow as people and be the best parents that we can be for London and Lincoln. And while this is, like Granger said, never going to be a replacement, we’re doingthe best that we can moving forwardcarrying what we have to carry in this new road that we’re walking.”
As they turn the next page in their family’s book, Smith says River is “part of many discussions every day,” including their “laughter” and “tears.” In fact, “He’s so much embedded in our daily lives as a family member that it’s just as if he’s still with us.”
Granger Smith and late son River.Granger Smith/Instagram
RELATED VIDEO: Granger Smith Reveals Final Special Moment He Shared with Son River That Suddenly Turned to Tragedy
“Wedon’t want everyone overshadowinghim with River and we don’t want him to grow up ever feeling guilty that he’s here because River passed away,” Amber says. “So that’s going to be a battle that we have to go with.”
Amber Smith and late son River.Amber Smith/Instagram
The Smith children.Amber Smith/Instagram
Smith and Amber tell PEOPLE they went back and forth for around eight months about whether they wanted to add another child to the family they’d once felt was complete.
And the moment the singer knew he was ready to take the leapinto a medically assisted pregnancy, as long as his wife was on board, was when his son Lincoln asked him during a camping trip, " ‘Daddy, does God make some of the trees and man make some of the trees?’ “, knowing that humans sometimes plant trees.
“And I answered without even thinking, ‘No, buddy. God makes all the trees, but sometimes man needs to plant the seeds,’ " Smith remembers. “It was kind of profound. It was a deep answer that I didn’t even really think about.”
After he broached the subject with Amber that night, she was initially hesitant, telling her husband, " ‘I don’t know how I feel about that, because who are we to pretend to play God and make babies in a test tube?’ "
“I started crying. And I said, ‘Because God makes all the babies andsometimes man needs to plant the seed,’ " Smith says. “Then it just all came full circle. And then from then on, I just knew we were on a mission. We were on a mission to run this to the end of the course.”
source: people.com
